Fear and change: Notes + observations


  • Have you noticed that when you feel the urge to change someone, what you really want is for them to behave more like you? (Yung Pueblo)
  • Self-awareness combined with action opens the door to real change. (Yung Pueblo)
  • There is nothing bad in undergoing change – or good in emerging from it. (Meditations 4:42)
  • Constant awareness that everything is born from change. (Meditations 4:36)
  • You can’t expect someone to change their mind if you take away their community too. You have to give them somewhere to go. Nobody wants their worldview torn apart if loneliness is the outcome. (James Clear)
  • What is fear? What causes it? Is it in our DNA? Is there anything we can do to stop it?
  • “If I need things to be a certain way, I’m held hostage by them.” Rugby player Jonny Wilkinson
  • Why do we let fear control our lives? For most of us, I think it’s habit. But you can eliminate bad habits, and form new ones!The first step to being courageous is being willing to look foolish. (James Clear)
  • It might also be a feeling of powerlessness…that we simply do not have the ability to live any other way.
  • How pervasive is fear in our business life? I don’t know, why don’t we ask management? Usually, they create a culture of top-down (fear-based) leadership that intimidates and rules through fear.
  • Can you be fearless? No. But you can hone your courage, which is simply being afraid, and moving forward anyway. It’s ok to be afraid. Everyone is. I love the story of the accomplished actor Henry Fonda, that even into his final years, he vomited before going on stage, due to fear. But he went on stage anyway…
  • How do you develop the skills to not be deterred by fear?
  • How do we deal with the “easier said than done” problem with fear? Meaning, yeah, easy for you to say that you have to dive straight into that scary thing. Well, for one thing, dealing with this is the difference between success and mediocrity.
  • What can management do about this? Empower their people, don’t making your response to mistake be a punitive one (for the right things, anyway). Top down managers are why employees feel fear in the work place anyway.
  • “Mistakes are the portals of discovery.” James Joyce
  • How does fear prevent us from going after dreams?
  • How does fear inhibit innovation, creativity, making art, etc…?
  • Is this a one-time fix? Or is this something that requires ongoing work, focus, and effort?
  • For me, when I’m hung up on something because of fear, often the best antidote is just to start. It’s amazing to me how the fear melts away when you are just in it, working the problem. Despite knowing this, I still sometimes procrastinate. Can we learn to do better at this? Is this a muscle we can strengthen?
  • How do we deal with the fear of rejection…this idea that people will respond negatively to our work? Is it as simple as not caring what people think? In that usually people’s reaction is a reflection of their own insecurities? Or jealousy that you shipped your work, and not them?
  • Are people lazy? Or just afraid? Meaning, are they spending all their free time watching Netflix because they are bums? Or just because they are afraid of failure, and watching TV is safe?
  • Why do people fear change? We don’t like the first day of school, or a new job, because it is unfamiliar, but the second day is SO much easier, because we know what to expect. Is that all fear is? A lack of familiarity?
  • “If you want to make enemies, try to change something.” Woodrow Wilson
  • “The measure of intelligence is the ability to change.” Albert Einstein
  • Isn’t it good for the soul to frequently make a decision that “feels like the first day of school?”
  • You know how when you rearrange a room, and then when you next walk into it, there is that feeling of excitement about the new set-up? It’s that feeling one is trying to generate when you incorporate change into one’s life. Not all change results in fear, it can (and should) lead to excitement.
  • “Intelligence is the ability to adapt to change.” Stephen Hawking
  • Isn’t there something to be said to the old maxim, “Do something each day that scares the hell out of you…” Honestly, this is the simplest, easiest trick to employ when learning how to combat your fear. You should force yourself to do just this.
  • Obviously, the more you try spooky stuff, the further you develop the muscle that makes it easier to tackle intimidating projects/things going forward. This is WHY you should do something scary every day…
  • “You are an animal of nature, fully endowed with hearing, sight, intellect, and dangerous defenses. You are not easy prey, so don’t act like you are.” Gavin de Becker
  • I sometimes wonder if we are afraid of success. As in, what is the cost to us if this new idea, new product, new movement actually succeeds? Does that change things? Do we fear that change? Are we frightened of the heightened expectations? Or are we retreating to the safety of the status quo?
  • “Sometimes what you’re most afraid of doing is the very thing that will set you free.”
  • “True security lies in the unrestrained embrace of insecurity – in the recognition that we never really stand on solid ground, and never can.” Oliver Burkeman
  • “Courage is not the absence of fear, but rather the assessment that something else is more important than fear.” FDR
  • People don’t fear change. People fear sudden change. People fear revolutions. People don’t fear evolutions.” Simon Sinek
  • Change is always happening, especially within you. (Yung Pueblo)
  • “I think there’s so much aversion to risk-taking, I don’t think that’s the right direction we should be going. You have to take risks if you want to learn anything about yourself.” (Video, Lhotse)

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